Crossing the River

When I started my journey in Numbers, I was a little hesitant. Now, I'm sad to be leaving. I've learned so much in this desert journey. To say that God has done some major demolition & reconstruction would be an understatement. As my time here has drawn to a close, I'm a little unsure of where I'll go next. I'm waiting on His guidance. I know there's a Promised Land on the other side, but I have to be honest...He's brought me to a pretty nice place now. I like where we're hanging out, me & Jesus. I'm not quite sure I'm ready to move on just yet.

The Reubenites and Gadites, who had very large herds and flocks, saw that the lands of Jazer and Gilead were suitable for livestock. So they came to Moses and Eleazar the priest and to the leaders of the community, and said, "Ataroth, Dibon, Jazer, Nimrah, Heshbon, Elealeh, Sebam, Nebo and Beon- the land the LORD subdued before the people of Israel — are suitable for livestock, and your servants have livestock. If we have found favor in your eyes," they said, "let this land be given to your servants as our possession. Do not make us cross the Jordan."
--Numbers 32:1-5

Some of the Israelites felt the same way. They didn't want to move on. After spending 40 years wandering in the desert, they finally found a comfortable place where their livestock would flourish. It was a good place.

It wasn't the best place.

As I read this, I immediately thought, "You idiots! You asked Moses not to MAKE you cross into the Promised Land?!"

And my Father gently said, "Melissa, how many times have I brought you close to the Promised Land, and you've refused to go in?"

Oh. Yeah.

But that was the old me. The new me is determined to get to her Promised Land! Whatever it takes...I'll give it up. The glimpses I've been getting aren't enough. I don't want to dream about it anymore. I want to hang my shingle there.

I didn't go to church much as a child. But one song from my childhood has begun to play over and over in my mind.

On Jordan's stormy banks I stand,
And cast a wishful eye
To Canaan's fair and happy land,
Where my possessions lie.

I am bound for the promised land,
I am bound for the promised land;
Oh who will come and go with me?
I am bound for the promised land.

*I Am Bound For The Promised Land
Rev. Samuel Stennett, Miss M. Durham, arranged by Rigdon McCoy McIntosh