It's October 4th. Wow. September is a blur, and that usually doesn't happen for me until later in the Fall. Yet here I am, wondering where the last few weeks have gone.
School started, and CJ has done so well. She's exceeded our expectations, and is having a wonderful year (until yesterday, which she proclaimed to be the worst.day.ever!) The difference between 4th grade and 5th grade is HUGE. She's getting herself ready without much prodding, reading without my nagging, and being way more responsible than I ever imagined. She's also branching out socially. Making new friends and going to "middle school madness" at our local YMCA. She will be 10 on Tuesday. I am not ready for this.
God is blowing my socks off in the youth Bible study. More than 20 girls each week...laughing, sharing struggles & triumphs, and GETTIN' INTO THE WORD. It has been so much fun, and blessed me more than I ever thought possible. Why didn't I get involved with the youth before now?
Yet with all the good going on, I've been under a cloud of apathy. I just can't seem to get motivated. The house is clean & decorated for fall (though I am coveting Jill's turkey platter), but beyond that...nothing.
~I've read a little, but it's been so long since I've given Jennifer a review for 5 Minutes for Books, she probably thinks I've slipped into the Atlantic Ocean.
~I'm not focusing on work as I should be.
~I haven't done anything to minister to my Sunday School care group.
~I've not responded to the sweet comments on my blog lately, and I feel like a heel about that.
~The attic still isn't finished.
I'll stop there, lest my ranting slides into a full-blown pity party. Late this week, I had the A-HA moment...when I finally figured out why I couldn't seem to care less about life around me. I haven't had a true Sabbath in several weeks. We've had commitments other than church. Good things, but they've taken away my day of rest...a day my soul needs just as much as my body.
For much of my married life, Sunday was "church and errand" day. Since I work outside the home, I spent most of Saturday was cleaning (when I was surrounded by clutter, it took much longer to clean the house), which gave me no choice but to grocery shop and run other errands on Sunday. I never realized what I was doing to myself and my family by not setting Sunday apart as a day of rest and restoration. Upon Joanne's advice, I became intentional about making Sunday the Sabbath. No chores, errands or obligations. Just worship, rest, dinner on the china, and family time.
I've let circumstances dictate my Sabbath for the past few weeks, and I'm taking it back. I need it back. Regardless of what doesn't get done today, I am not doing it tomorrow. I repeat, I. am. not. doing. it. tomorrow.
It's not just my act of worship to God, it's His gift to me.