I admit that in the past, I've scoffed at those who fasted. Never publicly. But in my heart I thought they were just a little crazy, a little misguided. I used Psalm 51:16 as my rationale. (It seems I'm not above picking out Scripture to suit my own purposes.) I never imagined God would instruct me to fast from a few things that were taking up too much space in my life. He was so clear, I couldn't even object. I didn't understand it, but I knew I had to obey.
Here I am, 11 days later. So far, so good. Amazingly good, in fact. Which is confirmation that this was God's idea. In my own power...well, I have none. I'd have fallen flat on my face about 10 minutes after I started.
I nearly did fail on Sunday. We were traveling home from a weekend visit with friends, and stopped for fuel. I was heading in to buy something, when CJ reminded me that it's one of the things I've given up. Honestly, I hadn't thought about it. I was only concerned with what I wanted.
I thanked my daughter (after her sarcastic prompting. If you have a tween girl, you know the tone.) Then I said, "Thank you, Jesus, for being so much better than _____________."
Then it hit me. That's it.
This fast isn't about being legalistic, self-righteous, or self-sacrificing. It's about being consciously aware that my Jesus is infinitely better than anything this world has to offer, and that He wants my attention.
Go ahead, Lord, I'm listening...
In sacrifice and offering you have not delighted, but you have given me an open ear. - Psalm 40:6 (ESV)