July 2, 2007

Honor Your Husband, Week #2

(*updated - part of my original post is missing. It was there to begin with, but I noticed when I was looking at comments that the bulk of the post is gone. I guess Blogger ate it! I'm trying to re-create it. Don't know if I'll be successful. But now all my comments are gone, too!)

We've finished two weeks of the "Honor Your Husband Challenge". Based on my own experiences, and reading those of other participants, "challenge" is definitely the appropriate word! It's so easy to put our husbands behind the children, the home friends. Why is it that we can't see that these big strong men need us just as much, if not more, than the other things/people in our lives? Or am I the only one in this predicament?

After setting my goals last week, I got off to a bumpy start. I finally got on the right track, though. On Thursday, we had a discussion about something pretty insignificant. I knew I was right, but the Lord held my tongue (in my own power, I would've knocked him over the head to prove I was right on this minuscule point!) Later, when R realized I was right, he told me so. Again, the Holy Spirit kept me from saying, "I told you so!" I felt the taste of victory...not from being right, but from not asserting my rights! He's probably forgotten the entire incident, but I realized I didn't seize an opportunity to put another chink in the armor of his authority. That is HUGE for me. And this will be my ongoing goal throughout the challenge, and beyond.

Christine's post today asked the question, "What do people learn of God by looking at your (my) marriage?"

I've never asked myself that question before, but I must admit that I've been quick to make judgments of other marriages. It's an occupational hazard. I'm a paralegal and the bulk of my work load is domestic. Unfortunately, I am bombarded with divorce and custody disputes every day. My job has given me an appreciation for my man. It's also caused me to become a master craftsman at appearances. I don't want other people to look on my marriage and judge it the way I've judged others. R and I really do have a terrific marriage. We love each other and are committed to each other. We're friends and soul mates. Yet it's not perfect, no matter how much I want to think that it is. If it were, I wouldn't find this challenge so challenging!

Which brings me back to my goals for the week:

Continue to:
~greet him when he comes home (pretty successful)
~leave him love notes (needs work)
~speak kindly to him & about him (improving)
~lay down my need to be right (a work in progress)

AND:
~create an atmosphere of peace in our home. I'm de-cluttering, re-organizing, & just altogether making big changes in the way I keep our home. I know when I'm done with this LARGE project, it will be a blessing to R& our family as a whole.

I'd love to hear how the challenge is going for you! Post your own link, or check other gals' progress, over at Christine's.



Melissa

12 comments:

Christi said...

Great post - lots of reminders for me.

Good luck with your goals for this week - praying that the Lord continues to bless your marriage!

Denise said...

May God bless you, and your marriage always.

Munchkin Land said...

Beautiful goals, I think you'll do great this week. And good for you for holding your tongue. I always have a REALLY hard time with that one!

The Preacher's Wife said...

i love this challenge...i haven't posted on it, but have been taking your suggestions to heart on ways to be sweeter to my man...:)

yours is a great list...practically mimics mine! ;)

lisa

blackpurl said...

I have worked on leaving my husband love notes too... I had no idea he would enjoy that so much!

May God bless you and our marriage throughout the coming week!

TammieFay said...

Keep up the good work, sista! Appreciate your encouragement and example!

Alana said...

Hi Melissa,

Thanks for stopping by my blog. I'm glad you like the new design.

I've enjoyed perusing your site as well. I love that you are taking the challenge to honor your husband. It's funny, your list sounds a lot like things I should be working on, too ;-)

The Small Scribbler said...

I've been to divorce court with two different friends. It is easy to let go...and so much harder to fight to get through the rough spots. When we stay the course though blessing follows. I too have a wonderful husband but as this post implies that is not to be taken lightly.

Kate

Christine said...

Love your 4th goal. I am one of those that always wants to be right too!

Your work must give you a bit of negativity about marriages in general. I pray you can release that after work each day!

Blessings!

Alycia said...

I love your last goal...I really need to do that as well in my home. I also wanted to thank you for your sweet notes on my blog. You have really blessed my heart with your kindness. Happy 4th of July!!

eph2810 said...

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and struggles with us this week. You know the words "I told you so" have come often over my lips. I really am trying to say them anymore...but it is hard somethings *sigh*.
I love what you have said:"Yet it's not perfect, no matter how much I want to think that it is. If it were, I wouldn't find this challenge so challenging!" - Amen to that!

PEZmama said...

I am just now catching up with all my blog reading. Just caught up with your last sixteen posts. Have you ever heard of "The Generous Wife"? She sends out a daily e-mail tip for women who want to be more generous to their husbands.

http://www.the-generous-wife.com/