February 2, 2009

Wise Beyond Her Years

CJ celebrated her 10th birthday in October. I took her hitting double digits pretty hard. I was hoping to hold on to my baby a wee bit longer. In the past two months, she's had to do more growing up than I would've liked. One instance, I'm not ready to share yet. The other, the death of a schoolmate. Through it all, she's shown a level of maturity and insight that has blessed me and made me so proud to be her Mama.

Certain recent circumstances have caused us to spend much time talking about choosing friends wisely. One afternoon, I was telling her that it's okay to be friendly with non-believers...but that it never works to be the only believer in a group of non-believing friends.

It's kinda' like tug-of-war, Mama.

Oh, really?

Yeah. If you're the only Christian on one side and all unbelieving friends are on the other, they'll pull you down every time.

Hmmm...I'd never thought about it like that before, but she's right.

Just as I thought life was returning to semi-normal, there was the school tragedy. I'm so grateful that God had arranged CJ's Wednesday night church class so that the topic was the age of accountability. In fact, we'd had a long discussion about it on the way home that night. Two short days later, my girl found great comfort in knowing that her schoolmate (4 years old) is in Heaven with Jesus. She didn't have to wonder or worry...she already knew. That knowledge has made it much easier for her to cope with the loss and with the changes at school.

And just this week, the 5th grade class voted for the yearbook superlatives. I guess they get to participate in this tradition (which I loathe) because they're the "seniors" of the elementary school. I'm not sure why anyone in their right mind would subject tweens or teens to this type of judgment. I nearly cringed when CJ told me about it, but then found myself fighting back the tears.

I knew I wouldn't get any of them, but I don't care. I know I'm creative and I know I have a good personality, so it doesn't matter who got them.

Given my perfectionist/people-pleasing tendencies, this is a lesson I'd do well to learn.

Without a doubt, my girl is growing up. She's not perfect. We argue over clothing, the computer, and her penchant for procrastination. I hear the signals of the fast approaching hormone train, and it terrifies me. Yet when I look past those things, I see in her a wisdom and a love for Jesus that is remarkable...and I'm so very grateful for the blessing He's given in allowing me to be a part of this special girl's life.



Joanne : The Simple Wife said...

Happy birthday, sweet girl!

(And, love the "hormone train"--it's a comin' down the track, no doubt about it.)

Love ya!


Joanne : The Simple Wife said...

Oops. Can you tell I read that too quickly? That is one late birthday wish.

I really do pay attention to what you write. Really!

Alyce said...

You do have a special girl:-) As Cam approaches the double digits (we've only got 2 years and it will go by too soon), it really brings tears to my eyes..and feelings of failure..but also feelings of joy as I can see how's she's growing and I love watching her personality come out!

Leah said...

What a neat girl! Sounds like you guys have done an A-OK job of raising her, too!

Heather C said...

Her description had me tearing up too. I hate those things too. Bless her heart... she has her mother's wisdom. :)

Jill said...

Oh gosh, it must be so hard to be a girl these days. A couple questions:

1. What are yearbook superlatives? I guess the best dressed, etc? Ugh. And double ugh.

2. If you're so moved, why is it that you feel it never works to be the only believer in a group of non-believers? I would think that would certainly be a hard situtation for anyone, let alone a 10 year old girl...but I'm not quite following the lesson/reason. Help!

Kelly said...

Oh I can totally relate to the double digit thing, Cassidy turned 10 in November and it was such a bittersweet reminder that another era has ended. Sounds like you have an amazing daughter with a true knowledge of just Whose daughter she is... good for her.

I have to say, her tug of war analogy was right on. My husband, as a high school administrator, frequently tells parents that in his 18 years in education he has NEVER seen a good kid bring the bad kids up, it is inevitably the other way around. Yes, our children can be "salt and light" in an unbelieving world, but I remind my girls it is one thing to befriend nonbelievers, and something else to trust them with your heart. Tough to be a tween in this culture, but I just know your godly guidance.

His Girl said...

she really is especially wise. love, love, love this post.