CJ & I worked in the attic some more on Friday. We've made a lot of progress, eating this elephant one bite at a time. I've adapted the "Clean Sweep" approach. We're almost done with the initial sort. This is the load we took to consignment yesterday. We've got a much larger pile that will have to wait til fall (clothing & holiday decor), plus a stack of plastic bins of things to sort (which will most likely go to consignment). There's one area left to weed through, to separate the "definitely keep" from the "maybe" and "definitely not".
Once that's done, I'll need to organize what's left to keep. CJ's special toys and baby clothes, photos, paperwork...I could give myself a headache thinking about it, but it's going to wait until fall.
It's been so freeing to haul stuff away. I get a thrill from getting things out of the house, whether it's throwing a box in the dumpster or taking it to the consignment store. Just knowing I won't have to look at it or think about it anymore takes a load off my mind.
I wish I could do the same with my sin and failures. I've been beating myself up for letting things get to this point. As I've tackled every job, I've berated myself for the mess I've created. There are times it seems that I won't ever be finished. Some days, I want to just give up.
Satan uses sin and failure so effectively against us that even after sincere repentance we often remain completely disabled...If we blow it as a parent, spouse, servant, employee, or leader, we should fall before God in complete repentance and ask Him what we must do to cooperate with restoration. Then we should follow Him in utmost obedience to His precepts. Restoration does not mean you can no longer stand for the truth because you fell. Restoration means you must stand!-Beth Moore, "A Heart Like His"
My aching heart needed to read that this week! Beth goes on to share Micah 7:8-9
Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise.
Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light. Because I have sinned against him,I will bear the LORD's wrath,until he pleads my case and establishes my right. He will bring me out into the light; I will see his righteousness.
~New International Version
I've been discouraged, and my discouragement nearly paralyzed me. This week, I got back into my routine of rising early to spend time with Jesus. I've worked to make things better for my family. I've hauled some unwanted junk away. I wasn't sure the consignment shop would take all the clothes I was taking yesterday. I told CJ that, if not, we would take it to the local ministry store because I refused to bring it back into the house. It's time to let God haul my failures away for once and for all. I don't want them back.
Though I have fallen, I will rise.
Amen, and AMEN.